SAD N HAPPY

Assalamualaikum...

I really missed writing stuffs in my small blog. :) Today, just came back from HKL, postcall... Actually decided to write sumthing the last 2 days, however didn't have enuff time bcoz went to kenduri kawin and also, belanja my family dinner with my oncall claims. :)

Been working in HKl for almost 3 months.. Really affect my heart so much. Maybe that's why I become a doctor... I'm not sure... But, being with patients just make me feel good... Maybe? I make them as my own makcik, pakcik, adik2... Life had been quite hectic working in HKL. However, it's not so bad.. hehe (If only you know.. ;) )

SAD
Yesterday, had 2nd patient, Chinese, passed away in front of my eyes. I couldn't bear my tears... Went to toilet and cried myself. It was really heartbreaking bcoz I knew the uncle so well. He had diabetes and also foot ulcer. He went for a bypass, but then the foot was not healing still... We tried to save his foot, did so many wound debridements(clean the wound) in OT(operation theatre) and also in the ward.

However, last week, he had hematuria(blood in urine).. and 2 days back he had PR bleeding(bleeding while passing motions).. Already showed signs of septicemia.. Used to have fun talking malay with him.. We always borak2 together... and finally he passed away in front of me... Tried to resus him.. but when I feel the pulse, it was no palpable pulse... when I listened to his heart, there was no more heart beat.. When I listened to the breath sound, there was no more breathing.. Finally when the MO came, he pronounced him dead at 12:10am, 30/1/2006, 2nd day Chinese New Year. Cause of death: Septicaemia *tearing already...* :(

Read Dr Max's entry... sad again. :(

Maafkan diriku.. Aku tak bermaksud untuk membuatkan kau bersedih... Tapi, hakikatnya, kita akan kembali kepadaNya, tetapi tidak tahu bila...

HAPPY

Terima kasih kepada pengunjung setia...
THE LIGHT OF DIRECTION

:)

Kalian dapat rasakan
Akan apa yang kurasai
Mungkin aku tak pandai untuk merahsiakannya
Dari bacaan hati kalian
Kerana apa yang kutulis disini
Datang dari hatiku jua...

:)

Mungkin benar sangkaan-sangkaan kalian
Yang ku cuba untuk menafikan
Bukan aku sengaja
Tetapi....
Tunggulah saat dan waktunya
Pasti akan kuberitahu
Pada kalian yang amat memahami isi hatiku
Walaupun belum pernah bersua muka

:)