Friday, April 13, 2007

DAYS IN MEDICAL

Assalamualaikum...

RAIYAN
First of all, would like to send GET WELL wish to my best friend, Raiyan, 8 weeks pregnant, and her parents in law met with accident and admitted to 3 different hospitals in Kedah... Raiyan sustained a fracture of the upper limb (tangan). May she'll recover fast and soon and hope her 2nd baby is fine... And as well as her parents in law. I received a sms from my friend, Bash. Bash said that they were in their way to KL for a wedding and suddenly met with a road ccident with a bus. May Allah give them good health and fast recovery... Ameen.

ONCALL MALE WARD
Alhamdulillah, I was oncall at my ward I was supposed to be in charge last Wednesday. It was very busy day during the afternoon. I was half dead by evening... Some more, that afternoon, my colleagues were away. Carrying baby inside the tummy and doing the heavy work as a HO is quite difficult for me, but slowly I managed to finish the works. Despite of so many chores to be done, I didn't forget to stop to pray... But I forgot to eat.. :) Anyways, by that evening, I can't help it. I needed to eat something. Poor thing for my growing baby... So, I went to eat the oncall food. Alhamdulillah, later that night, it was not so busy... 3 admissions and nearing the morning, one of the patients who just admitted passed away. The mother did not want active resuscitation and request for the son to passed away in the usual way... While consoling the mother, I found myself tearing inside me...

HANDLING THE WARD ALONE WITH BABY CALIPH
The next day, I was the only HO handling the ward because my 2 colleagues had to go for Infectious Control Course. So, I had to do round alone.. Luckily my MO came early and we did the round together. We finished quite early. Alhamdulillah, were not so many chores to be done. During the afternoon, the HO leader came and wanted to help me. I asked her to clerk a case and then help me to cover the ward while I go and eat lunch. After I finished eating and just about to pray Zuhr, I got a call from the ward saying that one of my patients already passed away. So, I just went there and the HO leader already resuscitating the patient. The cardiac monitor showed that there was no chance that the patient can revive back. So, I explained to the wife regarding the patient's condition. She requested not to further do CPR on her husband and let her husband passed away the usual way... So, another heartbreaking for me while explaining to the wife... Seeing her cry and saying that she did not go to lunch because she knew her husband is going to go away made me cry in the heart...

Handling the ward alone with like 20 staffnurses around me made feel so restless. They kept on coming on me and asking me... Until 5pm, I could bare the chaos, but after that, I asked them to ask the oncall people... To work for 36hours straight without a nap made me so tired and my body really aches... Actually I tried to sleep during my oncall, but my baby kept on moving whenevr I was free and lying down. So, I could just close my eyes but not SLEEPING!!!

VIDEO CLIP
I was reading blogs and came across this video clip...

Is Allah reminding me that Death is Near??? With 2 patients passed away and this beautiful tazkirah song Farshy Turab (Dust is my bed)???

BABY CALIPH
Well, now Baby Caliph is good at showing his buttocks and his feet on my tummy! Usually his buttock will be on my left or right side of my belly button. While, his feet will always kicking over my right side of the abdomen. It looks like humps and moving waves on the tummy! :) Baby Caliph also likes to listen to Ummi and Ayah talking. He usually wants to join our conversation. hehe. Can't wait to see Baby Caliph in just 10 weeks time!!!! InsyaAllah... :)

Lastly, Thanks Abang for the massage and bringing me to eat Ayam Percik... :)

Monday, April 09, 2007

JANGANLAH SEDIH

Assalamualaikum,

It had been long since I last updated my blog... Well, today, as usual, my husband not around, so, it's time for me to blog... :)

BABY CALIPH
Alhamdulillah, today is Baby's Caliph 30 weeks old in my tummy... Baby Caliph moving while I'm typing... Syyy sayang... Ummi nak tulis blog ni sayang! ;) Anyways, I still have on and off pain over my tummy.. Well, doing work as houseman at Medical ward... It is really heavy for me to do, need a lot of walking and standing! Both my legs aching whenever I came back from work. Usually I came back around 6pm or 7pm. Started working in the ward at 0730AM in the morning! My tummy aches whenever the baby moves and the head going down on my suprapubic area... But, Alhamdulillah, no more premature contractions. Hopefully and doa always so that Baby Caliph will be safely delievered by term.. InsyaAllah 37 weeks... :) Ummi tak sabar nak jumpa Baby Caliph yang terlalu aktif ni! Sakit perut Ummi! hehe.

MEDICAL OFFICER
I started to do my 5th posting at Medical 1 month back. But, I had to go to Kursus Induksi for 2 weeks after I tagged for 3 days. When I came back from Induksi, I had to do oncall as houseman(HO). After I oncall, I was admitted to the O & G due to premature contraction. Then holiday for 1 week. Then, I oncall again and then, I went to meet the specialist medical because they were telling me that I had to do job as medical officer(MO). But, then, when I met the specialists, they asked me to still do HO job for 2 weeks, and then, tag as HO for 2 weeks after that...

Suddenly, today, the medical officers were telling me that I have to start my MO oncall by this Saturday... I was so sad!!! I couldn't holdmy tears anymore... My eyes were already warm by that time. But, still holding on not to cry in front of the HOs and patients in ward. Actually, my husband gave me a call and wanted to tell me the same news... Finally, while I was helping another HO to do a procedure in the ward, my husband came and told me the whole story. The same story... Before my husband came, I went to Solat Asar... When I entered the room, I felt something awkward...

I FORGOT TO SOLAT ZUHUR!!!! ASTAGHFIRULLAHAL'AZIM!!! No wonder, Allah gave me such bad news for my BIG DOSA!!!

(But I was really busy in the ward that time.. I wanted to pray Zuhr at around 2pm, but there were so many people in the room praying. So, I continue doing ward works... And then, the MO came and do rounds. It just happened I was free during that time... So, I did rounds with the MOs until 5pm!!)

Please Forgive Me, YA ALLAH!!!

My husband sent me to the house eventhough he's oncall today... He was worried about me. He kept on telling me not to cry and Solat Hajat. He already planned that he will teach me starting tomorrow to see patients and cases in the wards and do a fast learning... I just kept quiet. I was still heartbroken, I guess...

So, I Solat Maghrib and Solat Isya'. After that I Solat Taubat and Solat Hajat and asked for Allah's forgiveness for my BIG DOSA!!! Was really crying away.... Minutes after that, my husband called and told me that he called the MO in charge of me. So, he said that actually the MO already planned to put me oncall as MO this Saturday, but, the specialists didn't want me to be oncall as MO yet...

Alhamdulillah!!! Syukur Ya Allah!!!

I know I did a very BIG MISTAKE, a BIG DOSA... Forgotten to Solat Zuhur...

But, syukur ya Allah for "hukum"ing me and at the same time reminding me to seek forgiveness from you... ASTAGHFIRULLAHAL'AZIM...

I'm not the best servant to YOU... But thank you Allah for such care and love that You had given me all these while... Thank You So Much Ya Allah for loving me...and my baby...

Thank you Abang for your support, love and care... :) May Allah make it easy and cool oncall for you tonight... Ameen...